Posts Tagged ‘buying engagement ring’
Buy Like A Guy: Guns for Hire
Listen, if you’re going to take the trouble to search the Internet to learn about diamonds…and then get in your car and drive from place to place to find the “best deal,” be sure to let the salespeople in those jewelry store’s know what you’re about. They work for you…they’re your hired guns.
Just say it…
When you go into a recommended jewelry store knowing exactly what you want…just say it already. Too many men cloak themselves in a shroud of machismo and actually prolong the buying process. Good business… great relationships… and authentic living are the result of effective communication. Be an effective communicator with your hired guns and they’ll treat you like the god that you are.
Footnote: Don’t be a hard-ass know-it-all when you present your case. While you may be well-versed as a result of your Internet travels, you will never know what a diamond professional knows. (Why would you want to exactly? Oh that’s right…you don’t want to get “ripped off.”*)
I was a member of an industry think-tank once upon a time… and our leader… a giant in the jewelry biz said, “I make it my business to know my business. Outside of that…I hire people to do what I am not an expert in.” That’s not only true…it’s bad-ass.
Tip:
Find someone to be your hired gun when you’re in the diamond market. Treat them as an employee of yours…because that’s really what they are. They work for YOU… and get paid to “do what you are not an expert in.” (Be a good boss though. No one likes to work for a jerk.)
What if you’re not the guy I just talked about?
Maybe you’re a little less sure of yourself. You think you know what you want… but you have some doubts and need a little more hand-holding. There is nothing wrong with that. Actually you are in for a much smoother ride in my opinion because you don’t need to spend a lot of time defending your position.
The beauty is you have hired guns as well… and they want to make sure you walk away feeling every bit the man you know you are. Why? Because they want to be your go-too diamond and jewelry expert for the rest of your life. The good ones live for it actually… it’s what they do.
Water the Horses. Feed the Men. Tonight we ride!
Quit looking at jewelry salespeople as your adversaries and make them part of your posse. How will you know if they are worthy of your requirements? I’ll spend more time on this subject in a future post…but off the top of my head I would do the following:
- Ask your buddies where they buy their jewelry. They’ll tell you far more than any company brochure or flash intro.
- Trust your gut. It is always your best guide. (In life and at the diamond counter.)
- Use local Google, Yahoo, and Bing searches. Many of them will have ratings on jewelers along with customer comments. Click here to see what this looks like. (It’s for my store.)
- Research jewelers and feedback from their customers on social media channels like WhereToGetEngaged.com and Facebook.
- Tell your potential employees that you want to make sure they’re the right fit for you…and then ask what you want to know in a matter-of-fact way. If they’re offended or put out by this… well… there’s your answer.
Having a hired gun in the diamond business will pay off in ways you can’t imagine. It will save you time (which = money) and energy… and it’s pretty cool to have a diamond guy/girl in your back pocket. That way you can focus on more important things like getting rock hard abs and training for the Backwoods Barbecue and Beer Chugoff!
Buy Like A Guy: Unmanly, Unromantic and Completely Unnecessary
I sat down and had a few conversational beers with some regular guys to find out what men think about when they’re on the diamond/engagement ring hunt. I have to be honest…I didn’t expect the conversation to focus on “salespeople” and “trust” as much as it did. I thought for sure the #1 topic would be price, but I found out that guys want real, live help at the counter and are willing to pay for it.
That’s really cool because the people behind the counter (the good ones) can and do help give you something that you can’t buy online in most cases: peace of mind. They are your Hired Guns and when a true professional is there to help it speeds up the process and takes some of the pressure off.
Under Pressure…Not!
Which brings me to the topic at hand: A lot of men feel pressure when it comes to buying the “right” ring and really not as bad as all that. I know how it goes…I’ve seen it a million times and it goes something like this:
- You are in love and spent some time talking to her and looking at ring styles she says she likes.
- You’ve found a beautiful ring that fits her style and the price is something you can live with.
- You’re standing in a store that speaks your language and you like the salesperson.
- All you need to do now is pull the trigger and buy the ring. Instead you say something like:”I think I’m going to bring her in to make sure she likes it.”
No…no…no…no and NO. You can and should buy the ring because bringing her in to look at yet another ring is unromantic, unmanly and completely unnecessary. How do I know? I asked women who are/were in the market for an engagement ring.
The Survey…
I wrote a very casual survey and submitted it to women with the help of several jewelry store buddies and Facebook fans. This is the question I asked:
How would you like the ring purchase to go down?
- I want to pick out the ring and that’s the ring I expect to see when I open the box. (10.1%)
- I want to show him the general style I like and as long as it’s in the ballpark I’m good. (61.6%)
- I’ll provide a laundry list and expect him to fill it. (Not in a mean way. I have to wear this ring the rest of my life!)(6.9%)
- I want it to be a complete surprise. I’ll take anything.(21.4%)
Nearly 62% of respondents said as long as you buy a ring that is similar to the style she picked out, you’re good. If you add the other 21.4% who want the ring to be a complete surprise then you have an 8 in 10 shot at being the man she expects you to be. Seriously…you know if she’s one of the other 17% so act accordingly.
But still…what if I pick the wrong ring?
There you go again…making it harder than it needs to be. That’s OK because I have this to share with you as well. The follow up question to the above was:
If he came home with something different than what I told him to get or hinted at I would:
- Be disappointed but OK. (54%)
- Be disappointed and mad. (4%)
- Love it just the same. (42%)
Only 4% of women will be “mad” if you propose with something she’s not expecting so the risk factor is extremely low. See? This is easy.
Go for it!
I grant you this is not the most sophisticated survey on the planet but it is telling. Feel free to take your own casual surveys as you’re out and about. Ask women what they think, combine those answers with my results and come to your own conclusion. Something tells me you won’t feel the need to “bring her in” anymore.
Personally I’d take this info and run with it. There are so many more important things to do than push off buying a ring with manufactured excuses. (For example…you can start planning your proposal.)
Let me know how it goes!
Does Your Bride Care Where the Ring is From?
I was recently writing about this subject for another article and decided that I would like to share my personal opinion on how I, and I’m sure many women, feel about where their engagement ring is purchased.
I wonder if men worry about this issue more than they let on. Do men feel the pressure to buy a ring from Tiffany’s or DeBeers? I really don’t think so and if they do they shouldn’t. Perhaps there was a time when women wanted their cookie cutter perception of a diamond ring purchased from a recognizable store accessible the world over, but contemporary women don’t tend to be too concerned with the “brand” of their ring. Women are interested in style and quality. Period.
I advocate for local jewelers; the kind where you can actually meet the owner and develop personal relationships. When searching for your perfect ring, I encourage you to bridge with your local jewelers. Go there in person and get a feel for their store and service. Find the ones that you like and feel that you can work with. Besides a more pleasant experience, you will find it easier to come back to this store if you have any problems, want to have your jewelry cleaned, or if you want to make important purchases in the future.
My personal experience is that smaller family owned stores are more willing to go the extra mile to keep you happy and ensure a stronger client/customer relationship. They tend to be more personally invested in the success of your purchase in terms of customer satisfaction opposed to some of the larger chain stores which tend to be more profit driven.
Can you have a successful experience at a larger store? Of course! But I myself am a believer in supporting most things local and family owned, especially when it comes to supporting local agriculture. And so I have happily applied this outlook to jewelry and could not be more happy with my experience.
The Fellowship of the Ring
For those of you that don’t get it, the title is a reference to Lord of the Rings. Moving on, I would like to share a few insights on buying the engagement ring. As a woman, I have never bought an engagement ring (nothing wrong with the woman proposing!) however it did not happen that way in my story. That being said, I think a lot of men may find the things my fiancé told me helpful in their quest and I would like to share them. One of the most important things is: Do your research!! This includes learning about the diamonds themselves but also the setting, the band, and the woman’s expectations. My fiancé spent a LOT of time learning about engagement rings, which is really important when you go to make that big purchase. If you are just picking one out, you have no idea what you are paying for if you haven’t read about it. Is the clarity poor? Does it have a tint? What about the cut and setting? The setting you want depends on what type of girl you are marrying. I have a setting where my diamond sits really high up on my ring and sticks out. This works for me because I am not a very active person and the ring never bumps into things. You may want to consider a diamond that is more set in the band if you have a girl on your hands that tends to be clumsy or active. Another thing to consider is what is your future wife expecting in an engagement ring. If you think she hasn’t built up this ring for years in her head, you are wrong. Most girls are perfectly willing to talk about the kind of engagement ring they envision for themselves so don’t be afraid to ask! If you want the engagement to be a surprise, try to take note of the kind of jewelry she already wears. Does she prefer classy understated jewelry or out-there pieces that get noticed? Also try to notice if you’ve heard the word “platinum” drop out of her mouth in recent months. If so, expect to shell out more!
Another important thing to consider is where you are buying the ring. I would highly advise against buying a ring at a store in the mall, they are notorious for being marked way up. Your best bet will be a reputable jewelry store in the area, they are usually ones that do jewelry repair as well. The people that work there often actually care about the customer and the pieces they are selling. I will leave you with these thoughts: get an engagement ring that your fiancé will love, she will be wearing it for the rest of her life. Keep in mind that she will be showing this ring to her friends, family, and strangers on the street and it will be a direct reflection of you and how much you spent on it. People will be judging it and there is no way around that. So choose wisely and know what you are doing when you go out on your shopping adventure! Good luck!
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Find the Ring
Plan the Proposal
Plan the Wedding
