Archive for the ‘The Wedding’ Category
The Discerning Gent: Please, No Turntables
There is a time and a place for DJs. A wedding is NOT one of them. I understand the decision to hire one. They’re cheaper, overly abundant (let’s face it, everyone knows someone that is one), and far easier to choose than the alternative; a live band. With a live band, you not only have to find them, you have to audition them as well. Yes, I can fully understand the desire to avoid a process that can be exhausting, time consuming and perhaps even painful. In contrast, the audition for a DJ often only includes asking whether they have the one or two dozen songs you can’t imagine your reception without. I get it. I understand traveling the route with less resistance. But let’s get one thing straight: THIS IS YOUR WEDDING. This is not the time to half-ass ANYTHING. If your budget allows for it, you must, simply MUST, hire a band. And even if your budget doesn’t, you should strongly consider revising it so that it does (perhaps axe a handful of “acquaintances” from the guest list). Let me tell you why.
Music evokes emotion. While it’s easy for a DJ to procure music you want to hear, a live band exudes energy and enables you and your guests to experience music. They intensify already intense emotions and ensure that the music is more than just mindless filler. Hearing music come blasting out of speakers as opposed to seeing and hearing people perform a song you love is a huge difference. In short, a live band is what sets the normal weddings that fade away into distant memory apart from the ones that are remembered by more than just the newlyweds. Of course, it may also be that a DJ makes your wedding memorable for all the wrong reasons… There’s nothing worse, in my opinion, than a wedding DJ that sounds more like he belongs at a nightclub than a reception hall.
And there are actually more types of bands out there than you might think. So no excuses about the fact that you’re not having an “upscale” wedding and a jazz band just doesn’t fit your theme. Although that’s what comes to mind when I think live band, remember that you can hire a band for just about any type of music YOU had in mind. Destination wedding in a tropical climate? No problem, hire up a local reggae band. Traditional Jewish wedding? I’ll bet the Rabbi knows someone. Regardless of the type of music or the setting, there’s a solution out there for you. My simple suggestion after all my typical elitism is just that you don’t automatically rule out a live band from the start. Give it a shot. Audition a few potentials. Trust me, the difference is astounding.
Steal Your Wedding: Vegas Edition
Vegas weddings! So much excitement at one time. The bright lights, the city, your love. What more could you want from a wedding? Savings? Vegas has that too. Keep reading to find out why Vegas could be your dream budget wedding.
Let’s cover the obvious – Vegas weddings cut out a lot of expenses from your wedding, not to mention the headache of planning. Most couples forego the traditional wedding attire and opt for something cool and casual. You are, after all, getting married in the heat of Vegas so pack for light and airy. Also cut out is the expense of a large wedding party and guest list. If you choose to have guests, keep it small as most chapels are a bit smaller and cater to small weddings. In addition to this, wedding chapels are just this – wedding chapels. We will discuss affordable reception options in a later post, but it is not expected that you have a reception following your chapel wedding. Go out and gamble to celebrate instead!
Wedding + Honeymoon = Savings. Another thing you will be saving on is travel. Can’t decide where to honeymoon? You don’t need to, you have all your fun waiting for you in Vegas – even down in your hotel’s casino. Not into gambling? There are thousands of other things to do in Las Vegas besides gambling! What’s great about this scenario is that you can start your honeymoon immediately after your wedding – no travel involved.
All-inclusive. Like so many things in Vegas, there are many wedding packages which roll all your fun and love together into an affordable all-inclusive package. And by all-inclusive I mean at the very least most packages will provide you with transportation from your hotel to the chapel, a chapel, officiant, music, flowers and pictures. This basic package will run you about $300 at most chapels. The best part? You can pre-order them online or wait until the very last minute. It’s Vegas!! The possibilities are endless. These packages range from wedding in the mountains to helicopter nuptials. Don’t know where to start with your planning? Visit our vendor list and search by location to find many options in Las Vegas.
We’ll break down exactly what your different options are for Vegas ceremonies and receptions on a budget, but this will get you started now and you could possibly be married this time tomorrow. Vegas, baby, Vegas! (Swingers – Netflix it immediately).
Weekly Dance Watch: St. Patricks Day Edition
In honor of St. Patty’s Day, let’s take a look at an Irish Tradition that doesn’t just include the pub. Riverdancing!! Take a look at how these couples show off their own Riverdancing moves and totally wow their guests. In the first one, the bride hikes up her wedding dress and does the most amazing dance ever all while looking beautiful as ever. Simply spectacular.
Ask A Bride: Best Man Speech
My brother asked me to be his best man at his wedding, and I couldn’t turn him down. However, I am really worried about the best man speech. I hate public speaking, and I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to sound like an idiot, so I am hoping I can find some examples of good speeches online that I can base mine off of. I want to keep it very short though so I don’t have to talk long and have less of a chance of messing it up. I want my brother’s wedding to go well.
- John, Colorado
John,
Hello! First, let me put your mind a bit at rest (I hope.) These concerns are very common for people faced with the toasts at a wedding. I too hate public speaking. The thought of doing my maid of honor speech at my friend’s wedding was terrifying. You are not alone! I think the majority of people out there hate public speaking. It is not easy. The good news is that everyone knows this and people are understanding when you’re nervous. So that’s ok! The other good news is that obviously your brother really cares about what you have to say and really, this speech is for him and his new bride. You are right on track already with how your speech should go. Keep it short! Also, your chances of messing up the speech goes down to about zero when you make yourself some notes. It is very common for people to do this. You can even write down the whole speech if you’d like. Take some tips from the videos you see on YouTube. There are hundreds of examples there! It will leave you with some good do’s and don’ts.
Here is your basic rundown of your short speech:
- Introduce yourself and say how you are related to the groom/bride
- Thank the groom for asking you to be his best man – even if you are dreading this!
- Tell a small anecdote about the groom and/or bride and groom OR you can describe their virtues and how great they are for each other.
- Raise your glass and congratulate them!
You’re done.
And you can start breathing again.
Let us know how you got through your wedding toast!
If you have a question for our bride, feel free to post a comment with your question or send a tweet to @GetEngaged
Benchmark Ring Giveaway for Couples on WhereToGetEngaged.com
Where To Get Engaged and Benchmark Rings are giving away a pair of Wedding Bands to one of our Couple’s Profile users! The winner will receive Benchmark’s Comfort Fit Wedding Bands in 4mm and 6mm for him and her. The winner will have the choice of 14kt white or yellow gold. Benchmark has been in business over 40 years and offers a fantastic lifetime warranty with every band. A Benchmark band has been engineered for comfort. Benchmark was the first to introduce the “Comfort Fit” design to the United States. This design allows for a better fit since the inside of the ring is curved so that it doesn’t cut into your finger during wear. This wedding band giveaway retails for over $900!
To be eligible to win create your Couples Profile (complete with “Your Story”) and add your top 3 Benchmark Rings to your wish list.
Contest ends on June 1st, 2010.
Steal Your Wedding: Invitations
How is it even possible that we’ve gone this long without discussing how to save on wedding invitations? Not quite sure. Unlike save-the-dates and wedding announcements, wedding invitations are not something you can forego. How do we save and invite at the same time?
Check out the DIY kits. There are endless supplies of DIY kits out there. In your crafty stores, in your chain stores, in your gift stores, and online. There is an endless supply of them and doing it yourself can really save you money! Before you consider this option, thoroughly do your research on the product. And my suggestion is to buy more than you need. You are bound to mess up on a couple (you’re human) and you don’t’ want to run out prematurely.
See what you can cut out. It’s tempting to load up on the paper when you’re ordering your invitations. And I understand, you want everything to match. Adding the menu, directions to the ceremony and reception, link to your wedding website, etc. Really, the basics that you need are – the invitation page itself, the RSVP card, and the envelope for the RSVP card.
Check for hidden costs. They aren’t hidden when you ask about what each thing will cost you. Even when you suspect it won’t. Want a different color ink? Want your return address printed on the envelope? Ask about it! Most likely, anything different than what you are presented as basic will be extra. That includes a more sturdy paper or adding ribbon. You don’t be sorry that you asked!
Let’s touch on some things that I don’t think are a good idea (personally).
Evites, emails, facebook invitations are certainly ways to cut out the cost of the paper invitation, but I don’t think we need to go that far. I may be an old-fashioned gal, but I think that if you are sending out wedding invitations, it must be done through paper. Keep in mind that this is most people’s first impression of your wedding – and we don’t want to send one that’s tacky. You can jazz up an evite as much as possible, but it’s still going to come across as tacky. Try to avoid it.
Also, I think we can all agree that putting things inside the invitation that explode out (such as sparklies, sprinkles, confetti-like gems) not only cost you extra money, but it’s also a bit annoying for those opening it and now have a bunch of confetti to vacuum up. If they are anything like me, it’s already too late because the dog has wolfed down the majority of whatever just fell out of your invitation. It will likely cut a bit out of your expenses and a bit of annoyance from your guests.
Having trouble getting started? Check out our list of 290 wedding invitation vendors! Click on “Plan the wedding,” then select the vendor category of invitations and search by state to find one near you!
How did you do your wedding invitations? Let us know! Leave a comment or talk to @GetEngaged!
Weekly Dance Watch: City Hall Edition
We’ve talked about how intimate City Hall Weddings can be, now witness how small and beautiful these occasions can are, courtesy of YouTube. Witness the intimate moments these couples experience exchanging vows in the fastest and smallest way you can. Simple and so sweet!
The Discerning Gent: The Kiss
When you think about wedding ceremonies, what do you typically remember? The wedding procession? The bride’s walk down the aisle? The priest’s words? The exchange of vows or rings? All great things, but the moment that most often stands out in people’s minds is the kiss. The embrace, the smooch, the smack, the peck, the kiss. As the first official act as husband and wife, husband and husband, or wife and wife, it’s symbolic. It’s a small yet integral part of your public display of love and adoration for one another. It’s the culmination of the entire ceremony and what everyone is really waiting for.
Talk about pressure.
I’ve seen a myriad of different kisses, from ones that are epic and beautiful to ones that simply fall flat. With so much anticipation for the brief moment, I can’t convey how disappointing it is when the newlyweds underwhelm the guests with a kiss that makes you think they’re related. You just married this person. Kiss them with a little passion and with, dare I say, love. One kiss I witnessed was so short, so half-assed, that an elderly woman behind me actually yelled, “If you don’t kiss him for real, I’m gonna come up there and show you how it’s done!” Sassy one she was.. But I shared her annoyance. The kiss is supposed to be the cherry on top of the ceremony. I can’t speak for everyone else, but I and most certainly the elderly woman behind me literally felt cheated.
Of course, there’s definitely such a thing as overdoing it. We’ve all seen one or two examples of kisses that make you want to shield children’s eyes. I’m talking about full-on, deep, tongue kissing that goes on longer than it took to say vows. In these cases, there’s definitely no shortage of passion or love. The shortage instead is with modesty. I can’t even begin to imagine how people can perform what is actually a step shy from full-on foreplay in front of friends and family. In my opinion, there’s just something awkward about doing that with your parents or other close family in the front row. Do us all a favor and save that “enthusiasm” for later.
Like most things in life, the middle ground or moderation is best. Land somewhere between kissing Aunt Petunia and playing tonsil hockey and you’ll probably satisfy the crowd.
Have a kissing story to tell? Post a comment or tweet @GetEngaged!
Ask A Bride: Wedding Parties
Hello! Me and my fiancé both are having a bit of a problem with our wedding parties. We recently became engaged but are wanting to get our wedding parties together now as our wedding is less than a year away already. What’s happening is that I am having bridesmaids (and groomsmen) who are not giving us straight answers about whether or not they will be able to commit to being a bridesmaid/groomsmen. Is there a polite way to get a straight answer from people without putting too much pressure on them?
- Lisa, California
Lisa,
I understand your dilemma! To cut down on these kinds of stresses for my wedding, I didn’t have a wedding party at all. I felt like it would be a stressful event as it is, I figured it would be easiest to just have me and my fiancé up at the altar. So what do you do when you are trying to get all your friends and family together at one place at one time? Well, you have to start reminding/nagging people for an answer. As you said, there needs to be a balance between being polite and putting pressure on people. What you need to keep in mind is that you aren’t pressuring them to say yes. You would just like an answer. And remind them of this as well! Also helpful? Give them a deadline. Not in a way a boss would, but let them know that you need to have your wedding party list finalized by such and such a date. I think really the best thing to realize is that if you are having trouble just getting an answer out of someone for this, imagine how difficult it may be to get them to the rehearsal, to the wedding, to the wedding shower, etc. If you hare having a really hard time getting an answer from certain people, I believe that is your answer and they don’t know how to tell you. Make it as easy for them as possible to give a truthful answer. If they can’t make it, they can’t make it. It may mean cutting down on your wedding party, but it would be best to know there will be people there you can depend on!
Let us know how you got your wedding party together below!
If you have a question for our bride, feel free to post a comment with your question or send a tweet to @GetEngaged!
Steal Your Wedding: City Hall Wedding Edition
Although I love weddings of all shapes and sizes, I have always had a special place in my heart for small, intimate weddings. Not only because my own wedding was about 25 people deep, but I love the intimacy that comes with surrounding yourself with the very closest of friends who want to truly celebrate your love.
You may be thinking that a city hall wedding means no elegance and no fanfare, but you could not be more mistaken. See the photos below to check out how you can make your city hall wedding one that is elegant, romantic, and all about love. I could go on about how much money you will save by cutting out the need for a ceremony location (no one says you can’t have a reception to follow your city hall ceremony!) but really, seeing these real city hall weddings is all the explanation you need for how to truly combine savings and beautiful simplicity.
- http://www.oncewed.com/26221/wedding-blog/real-weddings/vintage-city-hall-wedding/
- http://www.lifelovelipstickblog.com/2008/08/05/a-ben-chrisman-city-hall-wedding-erin-chris/
- http://lisanjames.com/blog/2009/03/27/meyeon-jess-san-franciso-city-hall-wedding/
- http://100layercake.com/blog/archives/4377
- http://bklynbrideonline.com/tag/city-hall/
- http://www.glamour.com/weddings/blogs/save-the-date/2009/01/genius-wedding-idea-city-hall.html
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